I like to keep my kids on their toes. Morgon, 11, asked me to dictate something to him for dictation practice today. Here is what came out.
We regret to inform you that your pet English bulldog, which you dropped off for a routine checkup on Tuesday morning, apparently has an enourmous appetite. After attempting to bit the nurse’s hand, “Fifi” got away, and proceeded to consume most of the animals in our boarding facility: some 13 cats, 7 dogs of various sizes, 2 cows, and 1 sheep. Oh, and 1 box turtle. We are deferring the costs for all damages, as well as the replacement of said animals, to you, and the charges will be added to your bill.
We do request that you come and pick up Fifi immediately, though we recommend the rental of a large moving truck.
Otis Handborn, DVM
Handborn Veterinarian Clinic
P.S. …And a ferret. Please come at your earliest convenience.